Busted.

[inakilt]

Well, confession time here. My name is Kevin and I am a closet nudist. Well, there ain't no door on the closet anymore. This morning I woke up early (430am) to bring in the start of Nude Recreation Week (look it up, it lasts through the 14th). There is a 5 mile wooded loop trail (actually a fire road) with a really nice packed sand surface at a state park about a mile from my house, so I got in the car and drove to the park (naked). There was no one on the road at that hour so no big deal. My car has a really nice keyless entry feature and I don't need to carry my keys, so I locked them in the console, then went for my run "starkers". It was a great run, the temperature was about 70F and there was a really nice gentle rain falling. No problems, right? I didn't figure on one thing, the sun comes up about 6am this time of year, but it starts getting light about 20 minutes before that. So , right about the time I am finishing my run, it's daylight.

Next problem, folks use the parking lot as a park'n ride lot. So as I start getting close to my car I start seeing other cars, lots of cars and lots of people, not good. The last thing I need to be is busted, so what do I do? I turn around and run the loop again, in the other direction. I was pretty worn out after the first 5 miles so the second 5 took me over an hour, by the time I get back to the parking lot the cars are still there but most of the people are gone, so I dash to the car, punch in my numbers, and head home.

Next problem, traffic. I am never on this stretch of road at this time of morning, and I didn't realize that the cops are usually out here directing traffic. I looked in the back seat for something to cover me, and all I find is a small plastic bag from Dick's Sporting Goods (no lie). So I make it past the cops and all the way home.

Now, it's about 730 and I should've been in the office a half hour earlier. So I walk in the front door, and Mamasan is sitting in the living room with a cup of coffee. She looks up at me, and her expression is priceless.

"Forget something?", she asks, calmly.

I say, "No, just out for a run".

"You working today?",she asks (same tone of voice).

"Not right now." I reply.

"I can see that.", she says.

So I go get a quick shower, dress, give her a kiss, and start heading to the office.

I got home about 5pm tonight, and my son is sitting on the couch.

"Where's Mom?" I ask.

He replies, "Oh, she went to the park for a run."

Busted.

 

[RunningPirate]

Great story, but methinks you're still a closet nudist (a real nudist would have strut right out into the parking lot full of people and proceeded with jumping jacks and toe-touches).

The only time I was nude was during a Mardi Gras party - I was drunk and my GF asked if I wanted some beads...it seemed like a good idea at the time. Fortunately, this was before digital cameras were ubiquitous. Regardless, there's enough pics of me to keep me out of politics for three lifetimes.

 

[migangelo]

i was living with a gf who dared me to run around the block naked. so i did it. with shoes on of course because i was unenlightened then. i didn't get any sex out of it though. was a waste of time.

 

[jldeleon]

Dick's Sporting Goods -BWAHAHAHAAA!

 

[Darkand]

Lol, that is just brilliant. You should stash a pair of shorts on the trail, close to the car park, in case it happens again. Lol! Close call in the car park!! I wonder did anyone see you tearing off in the trees in the buff. I have visions of someone seeing you, rubbing their eyes, checking again and you're gone... Bigfoot sighting in the area! Lol.

 

[rickwhitelaw]

Nice story! Funny about the Dick's bag. You could have looked for a hot dog wrapper I guess.

 

[bfsailor]

I'm just impressed (and maybe a little jealous) that you have a place where you can do a ten mile run naked without passing any other runners or hikers.
Maybe you could organize a Naked 10K? You might be able to get Dick's Sporting Goods to sponsor it and provide plastic bags for a race premium!

 

[DNEchris]

Glad you got in a longer run!

 

[Barefoot TJ]

I looked in the back seat for something to cover me, and all I find is a small plastic bag from Dick's Sporting Goods (no lie).

 

[Barefoot TJ]

There's a bunch of nudist runs popping up all over the place where people run naked. Talk to Patrick Sweeney. He does them all the time. You could do those if you need more starky runs. <---- Perfect smileys for this! Ha!

 

[Longboard]

Dick's Sporting Goods -BWAHAHAHAAA!

Maybe 8 or so years ago my father asked our youngest son what he wanted for his birthday. He told him about a specific new type of skateboard, and getting up in years my dad told him to just purchase it himself using his credit card info. Our son found a great deal online at Dick's Sports, and really enjoyed riding it while it was something new and different.
A few months later my father related to us over dinner how he had almost been scammed by a porno site.
He said his Visa account had a $100 + charge from dick-sports, but luckily he had spotted it and reported it to the bank card and didn't end up paying for the porno charges he had never incurred.
We tried to make it straight with them but finally gave up after finding that they were just making it too tough to come clean.

 

[inakilt]

Fortunately, This is not the same place. Dick's Sporting Goods is a fairly large chain of real stores. Two of which are within 5 miles of my home.

 

[Longboard]

Same place, just their online version. The charges were legit, they were just falsely assumed to be attributed to a porn site.

 

[inakilt]

There's a bunch of nudist runs popping up all over the place where people run naked. Talk to Patrick Sweeney. He does them all the time. You could do those if you need more starky runs. <---- Perfect smileys for this! Ha!

LOL! I just signed up for 2 nude (actually clothing-optional) 5Ks. One in August and one in September. Both within a few hrs of home.

 

[Barefoot TJ]

Hysterical!

 

[Bare Lee]

Ha! I used to run nude late hs through a little wooded area near my house at night. Great feeling.

 

[Refoman]

I'm just impressed (and maybe a little jealous) that you have a place where you can do a ten mile run naked without passing any other runners or hikers.

It doesn't matter how early I go out, I encounter traffic (I cross several major roads on my path) and dog walkers (i.e., folks taking their dogs to "do their business" along the path who also leave "the business" there), cyclists, and even a roller blader (always dressed in dark clothing). It would be nice to run "au natural" on these beautiful summer mornings.

I am a little surprised that there are not more clothing optional types embracing barefoot running and vice versa. It seems that some of the underlying philosophy applies to both.

 

[inakilt]

.......I am a little surprised that there are not more clothing optional types embracing barefoot running and vice versa. It seems that some of the underlying philosophy applies to both.

Kind of the way I look at it too. Yesterday, I spent most of the day outside; mowing the lawn, cleaning the pool, swimming, grilling some burgers, etc..., I even installed a new ceiling fan, all nude. It would not bother me if I never had to wear clothes. That said, I enjoy being rebellious, I am barefoot most of the time, only wearing shoes when it is absolutely necessary, I even paint my toenails once in a while (as you can tell from my avatar). Wearing kilts allows me to experience a little clothing freedom, still being a little bit of a clothing rebel, but not enough to put people in shock. It would be great if American's would lighten up concerning nudity. The biggest problem is that our society has been conditioned to primarily equate it with sex, and has totally ignored the fact that it can be a very healthy lifestyle, both physiologically and psychologically, perhaps even spiritually. Until that changes nothing will change here concerning it.

 

[Ahcuah]

I am a little surprised that there are not more clothing optional types embracing barefoot running and vice versa. It seems that some of the underlying philosophy applies to both.

In fact, if you go to nudist resorts, you'll see shoes everywhere. It's as if, while so many (not all) free their minds from needing clothing to cover their "privates", they never manage to overcome the idea that shoes are a necessity.

I blogged about it here: http://ahcuah.wordpress.com/2013/02/20/nude-menbut-not-really-nsfw/

That gave me a lot of grief from the nudist community. And if you read the comments there, you will see that many of them made the usual shoddie excuses for needing shoes.

 

[migangelo]

it's hard to wash the brains of the brain washed.